Blogger Templates


It was suppose to be another typical and boring day like before until I heard that news from my sister. She told me that their relationship is over already; she dumped him, again. This time is for her new course mate that she met during her work trip to Pulau Sipadan. When I heard that they break up, I dance with joy like a kid who got a special present for her birthday. This will be the perfect time for my confession to him, to that man who was once my sister’s boyfriend. My sister is so stupid to dump that charming man for some random guy that she just met; if I am his girlfriend I would not let him go. His name is Qayyum; he is my first crush, my guardian angel and my sister ex-boyfriend. My love for him is inexpressible, but all I am to him is the younger sister that he never had. Why can't I be more than that? Am I not good enough? Even if I'm not as pretty as my sister, I can take care of him better than her; I can show him how much I truly love him. 

It is almost that time of the year; it is almost the time of my birthday. ‘All I want is to fall in love this year! Oh, all I ever want is to be with him, my guardian angel. That's all I'm asking for,’ I thought to myself as I clasped my hand and closed my eyes; hoping for the heaven to hear my prayer. So, I will meet him there today, at our usual ‘dating’ spot and confess my long concealed love to him as he is single and available now. “Ah, the weather is nice”, I said to myself as I enter the park  full of beautiful flowers where we suppose to meet each other today. I smile as I look at the well-decorated box of handmade chocolate in my hand. Then, I just sit on one of the benches next to a big fountain and look around at the people around me while waiting for him. There is not so many people come here today. Not far from me, I can see a cute little girl, maybe around 5 years old talking with and old man that seem to offer her ice-cream. As I watching them, suddenly I feel my phone vibrates in my pocket and it display 'Abang Qayyum' name. He tells  that he will be late for the meeting.

Suddenly, I feel something fall onto my forehead. I am wondering what it is and find out that it is a bird poop. I rush to the fountain to clean the gross thing off my head. The damn bird is sipping water leisurely at the same fountain. I look at the bird hatefully and try to chase it away. Then, I stop when I heard someone is calling my name with It only take me a few of seconds to find the owner of the soothing and warm voice that can melts my heart. I am looking around, turning and then you spot him. I was about to run quickly into his embrace when there is a sharp voice pierce my ears. I look up just to see my sister come towards me together with him, intimately; his hand on her waist and her head on his shoulder. Right now, I really hope that human muscles memory can be function like computer; then I will press the delete button in my memory. So, I will be able to forget about everything. “Hey, what do you want from my sayang?” she said to me with a pout on her face. “I...I just want...” I try to answer her but I keep stutter as I am too shock due of their reconciliation. He flashed that million dollar smile of him and asks, “Is there anything you want me to do for you?” I nod and tell him that I need him to tutor me for my chemistry because I have problem with the subject – which is totally a lie. “Everything for my baby sister,” he said and promises that he will tutor me on the weekend. I suppress the urge to cry and try my best to show them that I’m happy for them but deep down inside I am bleeding. Honestly, I hope I can tell him that, please…

Don't be too kind,
Don’t be too sweet,
Don't be too caring,
Because I might fall,
And hurt myself; badly…